the moment is sweet

The moment is Now. Not a second later to begin what I really feel like doing because there is a pause, a deep breath, and the beautiful clouds of thought swirling around me just now might never be here again. Just felt like sharing this with you guys.

TCS Technopark at SIPCOT by night

Here is a series of photos taken during those jobless hours from the terrace of CMI using my friend's camera...

Central building of three on the east side. There are three more on the west

shadow of some leaves

In between the centre and left buildings the "connector" building can be seen

central building again

south building, east side

detail of the "sun shades"

east centre and north buildings in background, a part of CMI terrace in foreground

detail of the garden in TCS complex (photo by Prateek Karandikar)

a short stretch of 1st Main Road in SIPCOT IT Park in front of CMI (photo by Prateek Karandikar)

Orion, setting above TCS building

Full moon on 18/04/2011 (photo by Prateek Karandikar)

Full moon above further offices and construction sites

another, longer exposure to capture Orion (bulb shot without remote control)

Fear

There is nothing left worth following, nowhere left to go. With only a hundred rupee note in my purse and a couple more in the bank I set off towards my next destination, name unknown. I hold in my hand a certificate which says I have studied Mathematics and Computer Science for three years in some godforsaken corner of this country. There is water in a puddle attached to my foot wherever I walk and it threatens to reach my foot and soak it, rotting the very skin of my soles, if only I stay someplace long enough. So there is no question of staying put, I must move on.
I have a water bottle from which I take a sip now and then to refresh myself. There is a pair of headphones perched on my head. It is my drug, it transports me to other corners of the globe and beyond. It transports me to a place where time flows in all directions and oozes through the cracks under the door. Time is a viscous fluid and I dare not try and stop it even for a second because once its natural course is tampered with there is no telling what damage it might cause. It has a life of its own, however much I hate to accept it.
I cannot go home anymore because I have been soiled. After having breathed the dirt of centuries of men who all left their homes and took stock of themselves, I can still step into the space which was once home. A brief pause, a brief illusion of getting back into security and that is all. I know even during this break that things will never be the way they used to be before. I must proceed. Something called "my life" lies ahead of me and from here I am scared to even look at it because I dread it is going to be a tread mill without an "off" switch.
Perhaps it will look different a short distance from here.

Undecidability of decisions

Big time. Decision time. So sit down with your paper and pencil and put on your thinking cap (if you have got one). Start out by listing first the possibilities and all the pros and cons. When you get confused, call up a friend and ask him to come over to help you. That way your piece of paper will look a lot fuller than you could have made it look if you had done the whole thing alone.

Finally when you make a decision it may have nothing to do whatsoever with what you have written down. Are you under the impression that you can make decisions about your life? Then think again. Many unexpected things keep happening and there are so many surprises. If there is one illusion which humans suffer it is the illusion that they will be able to steer their way through the course of events in future sitting here in the present. I am almost sure that this is not possible.